Arrogance creeps in on the back of unbounded pride. Arrogance can never be wrong. It tries to always prove it is right. If it cannot find the path in conversation to prove that it is right when it is not, Arrogance will change the subject to something else of greater drama that centers upon the self. It is a deflection method attempting to hold the reigns of ego tight. Expect a huge amount of dramatic flare when this happens. Sound familiar?
This situation is more obvious with narcissistic behavior. Yet even the nicest, most educated, and wealthiest among us trips on the tongue of the ego from time to time. We have made great strides in our efforts in life that have earned us great success personally, academically, and in some cases, financially. On its own, worldly success can be a noble goal. But when it is combined with unbridled ego, which twists realities to such that they can never be wrong, then the ego carries the self into Arrogance, a very unbecoming trait.
It is possible to recover from the addiction of Arrogance. It is a form of mental illness when left unattended. Arrogance sets the stage for a faux reality where it becomes the star of an altered reality show in real life. If Arrogance had a smell, it would be a stench. After a while, the one wearing Arrogance as a sort of badge of honor, will notice its effect on others, that is, if Arrogance has completely overtaken the personality.
Becoming aware of Arrogance motivating every thought, word, and action is the beginning first steps on the road to recovery. Arrogance tells on itself. In its ego, Arrogance feels the need to shine a light on its unbecoming behavior, as a prideful accomplishment.
Arrogance not corrected eventually erupts, sooner or later, into a major dramatic self-implosion of ego, usually based on past successful dramas stored in the mental memory of the DNA. The familiar Arrogant mental, well-worn pathway reverts back to similar old triggers and justifications, as a means to prove it is right in its deflection trick to not be corrected in the current drama.
Are there things to watch out for as we go through this school of life in order that our lives do not become addicted, Arrogant, narcissistic experiences?
25 Keys to recovering from Arrogance:
- Notice how you interact with others of all stations in life.
- Notice the attitudes you feel, without judgment against yourself.
- Notice the attitudes you project, like rolling your eyes when others speak.
- Notice if you treat others with the same dignity with which you wish to be treated without justification.
- Notice if you go off topic.
- Notice what triggers you into other topics.
- Notice your response if or when someone corrects you.
- Notice if your Arrogant responses affect the reputations of others.
- Notice if Arrogance drives you outside for all the world to see and hear.
- Notice if you can ever go back to the original topic which began as a correction, and deal with the hurt of another your thoughts, words, and actions caused, without transgressing back into the Arrogant paradigm you set up for yourself.
- Notice if you are a self-made victim stealing the limelight.
- Notice if your intentions to heal the Arrogance addiction are from a genuine motivation to heal, as opposed to placing you into better standings with others, or other self-serving situations.
- Notice if you use manipulation techniques for a desired outcome.
- Notice if you use guilt for a desired outcome.
- Notice if you use obligation for a desired outcome.
- Notice if you use fear or threats for a desired outcome.
- Notice what motivates you.
- Notice if you have any hidden agendas.
- Notice how you communicate.
- Notice how much you talk.
- Notice how loud you talk.
- Notice how much you interrupt others, suppressing their voice.
- Notice if you need to control people.
- Notice if you need to control everything.
- Notice if you can wake up humility and apologize to others for your own mistakes.
All of us make mistakes or we would not be human. Not one of us is perfect. It is better to own up to our mistakes and consciously work on them, than to pretend we did nothing wrong and that the problem always lies with the other guy. The truth is, both sides need to apologize for their part in the drama, for changing the subject, and/or for an emotional delivery of the topic. If the original point of conversation is not addressed, everything else is simply deflected drama.
What is required to recover from Arrogance addiction is humility. Healing from Arrogance requires a contrite heart, something that may feel odd and unfamiliar at first, depending upon how long Arrogance has sunk its roots deep into the justification of the individual. It also requires a pensive and honest examination as to why the constant mantra, “I did nothing wrong,” is so common.
Contrition is the soothing balm healing the deep rooted scars Arrogance leaves behind. Rather than the stench of Arrogance, humility and honesty leave a beautiful fragrance, softening the heart, mind, and voice, healing relationships and situations. Humility is freeing to mind, body, and spirit.
Love conquers all.
Namaste