Here are some traps to avoid those thoughts and emotions that hijack your mind and memories like an unattended runaway train careening down the mountainside cliff of depression. Following each trap is the mental health tip to remind yourself of in the New Year 2022.
Notice the word “remind,” as in correcting your mind that the erroneous notion of energizing negative perceived thoughts and emotions are your reality, and all else is non-reality. Reset your mind, remind yourself to be fully present in the present moment.
Avoid the mental gymnastics of mental moving-making reruns that keep you living in the past, clouding your present moment, and overshadowing your future.
Trap: Feeling depressed and recalling to the present moment all of the injustices everyone individually has ever done to you.
Tip: Learn from the past as you review your life at this moment. Discover what went right and what went wrong. Stop lamenting. You cannot change the past. But you can make more life-affirming decisions with compassionate understanding in how you handle similar situations in the future.
Trap: Wallowing in old familiar hurts, mental anguish, and regrets, refusing to think of anything other than those worn-out painful memories.
Tip: Change the record on your mental record player. Change these negative pre-recorded tapes stuck on rerun. You can change negative thoughts and obsessions by mentally putting them on the back shelf of your mind. You are not denying these things happened. They are part of your lived experience. They are fodder the life lessons as they came to you, reminders not to slip back into what did not work for you. But these past negative experiences need not dominate your current every thought, word, nor action. By mentally setting them aside, you make room for more constructive thoughts, decisions, and positive alternatives, allowing you to live in the beautiful gift of the present moment.
Trap: Stubbornly refusing to dodge the bullets of self-sabotage when you recognize it is beginning to happen. This is just as addictive as drugs, alcohol, gambling, sex, or any other addiction.
Tip: What you focus on grows. Consciously tell yourself to think of more positive thoughts, even when a part of you fights this notion. That is part of the self-sabotage trap. This is the ego running full steam ahead, much like a two-year-old temper tantrum. Don’t give in to it. Stop being a victim. You are not a victim of your thoughts. You think your thoughts. Your thoughts do not think you. Reclaim your personal power by constructive alternative thoughts, words, and actions. Come back to the present. Release the past for a better present and future.
Trap: You feel helpless, with no energy.
Tip: At the moment of feeling lethargic, inertia is at work. Things in motion tend to stay in motion. Things at rest, including you, tend to stay at rest. This is the law of thermodynamics at play. The key to a stuffy, bottled-up house is to open the windows and let the sun and breeze in. It starts with a concept. Change what you are thinking about to a good memory, a fun time, a moment that made you smile. Naturally this does not change the past experiences. Still, make a new plan to improve some aspect of yourself, or to look at others with more empathy, both for yourself and them. Take a ride in nature. Get a bouquet of flowers. Cook something delicious. Boil cinnamon and cloves in water on the stove. This aroma, like citrus aromas help to lift moods.
Trap: Mentally feeling and acknowledging you are in a negative mood, over, and over, and over in your mind, because that’s the way you are feeling.
Tip: Moods follow thoughts, always. It is never the other way around. The way to change your dark, negative moods is to think more positive thoughts. It is a mental switch you flip in your mind. This is a conscious decision you make. Make a positive, life-affirming plan. Make lots of plans. Brainstorm positive alternatives and choose one to follow.
It might seem like you have a bucket of cement encasing your body, mind, and spirit, as if you do not have a choice after a year of disappointments, crippling seclusion, and mandated changes to your life for the greater preservation of all people. Do not fall victim to this self-sabotage. Know there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Also remember that now is not forever. Things can get better, no matter what is going on in your life.
Things can also get worse, much worse, depending on how much you want to torment yourself by negative thoughts. You are in charge of you, no one else. The choice is yours.
Know that now is not all there is. The future is bright for you, in all ways. There is much to discover in this life. There are opportunities and new therapies yet to discover. Science discovers new things every day. Find the hope, the joy and the abundance of all good things. That is my New Year’s wish for you.
Namaste